The moment I ran the velvet lipstick over my bottom lip I felt more confident. The red color soaked up my plain lips and with a name like Cruella, who wouldn't feel invincible!
I go through phases of loving my body and phases of feeling confident in the way I am today. Phases where anything I put on that day feels like it fits like a glove and I walk out of the house with a sass in my step. Then there are the days where I go through 12 of the same exact t shirt/pair of pants and I feel like nothing looks good on me at all.
We all have those days... and sometimes it feels those "nothing fits right" days out number our sassy/unstoppable days.
I have been trying for a few months to drop some weight and I was feeling like nothing I did could make me see a change. I cut down my soda intake, my fast food intake, added some small exercise routines, worked on my sleeping habits...nothing was working! I found myself comparing my efforts to those around me who were pinning those workout suggestions on Pinterest or posting pictures of themselves at the finish line of a 5K or those awkward gym selfies that (let's be honest) no one really cares if you're workout went great or not.
I don't really pin workouts on Pinterest because well... I probably won't do them. I definitely don't sign up for any 5K's because the only places I'm usually running to are the bathroom or to the car if it is pouring the rain. I might be guilty of one or two gym selfies when I actually use to be a regular gym goer but now my selfies include hugging my cat Carl while he struggles for air and freedom.
I will admit that over the past few years I have obsessed a lot less about being a bit overweight. I'm not sure if its because the older I get I am focused on more important things, I just don't care, or I've become more open to accepting that I will never be a size 6 woman.
The older I get I do realize that older men look for more of a personality and someone to enjoy their time with rather than a size 6 to show off to their buddies. No... I'm not saying that I long to be thinner so that I can gain the attention of a man... that is only a tiny piece of this struggle. More often than not I find myself telling a man that if he doesn't like how I look then he can hit the road. It is mostly women that I find myself seeking the attention/approval of when it comes to looks. It seems to be that women are more critical of other women than men ever were or tend to be these days. If we know how it feels to be judged on our appearance then why do we do it to each other?
It is a difficult thing to work on comparing yourself to others and judging others as well. Some times we catch ourselves casting judgement on people even without meaning to do so. "I can't believe she thinks that shirt looks okay on her." or "Did she even look in the mirror before she left the house this morning?" I will be the first to admit I have done it and still do it just in every day conversation without thinking twice about how I feel when that happens to me.
It moments like that when I realize I quite possibly need to spend more time grounding myself in the Lord. Yes, I realize this sounds silly and trivial and a moment where you are thinking.. yeah yeah... the answer is always Jesus...get closer to God but really people...it is the answer!
The more I pour myself into the word and the more I spend focusing on Christ the less I see myself acting like someone I would be ashamed of or doing things I don't approve of when its on the flip side. No there isn't a specific verse that says " and Jesus said... do not make fun of the girl in the ugly shirt or do not make jokes because another girl did something weird with her hair."
But the Bible does call us to be Christ like... and being Christ like covers a multitude of attitudes, issues, and priorities. The more you become more Christ like you will learn to love yourself in return.
Over the past few months I have been working on walking the straight and narrow, as they say. Spending my time focusing on my relationship with the Lord and although I am no where near where I need to be... I am not where I once was.
I find myself leaving the house more confident whether it is in those paint stained workout pants and a Goodwill t-shirt or that cute dress and red lipstick... I'm walking out of the house confident in the Lord's plans for me and that whatever happens today or how I look...I can make it a rough day and complain about my muffin top that I don't necessarily work on improving or I can make it a good day and only let words of encouragement about myself and others come across those velvet red lips.
I go through phases of loving my body and phases of feeling confident in the way I am today. Phases where anything I put on that day feels like it fits like a glove and I walk out of the house with a sass in my step. Then there are the days where I go through 12 of the same exact t shirt/pair of pants and I feel like nothing looks good on me at all.
We all have those days... and sometimes it feels those "nothing fits right" days out number our sassy/unstoppable days.
I have been trying for a few months to drop some weight and I was feeling like nothing I did could make me see a change. I cut down my soda intake, my fast food intake, added some small exercise routines, worked on my sleeping habits...nothing was working! I found myself comparing my efforts to those around me who were pinning those workout suggestions on Pinterest or posting pictures of themselves at the finish line of a 5K or those awkward gym selfies that (let's be honest) no one really cares if you're workout went great or not.
I don't really pin workouts on Pinterest because well... I probably won't do them. I definitely don't sign up for any 5K's because the only places I'm usually running to are the bathroom or to the car if it is pouring the rain. I might be guilty of one or two gym selfies when I actually use to be a regular gym goer but now my selfies include hugging my cat Carl while he struggles for air and freedom.
I will admit that over the past few years I have obsessed a lot less about being a bit overweight. I'm not sure if its because the older I get I am focused on more important things, I just don't care, or I've become more open to accepting that I will never be a size 6 woman.
The older I get I do realize that older men look for more of a personality and someone to enjoy their time with rather than a size 6 to show off to their buddies. No... I'm not saying that I long to be thinner so that I can gain the attention of a man... that is only a tiny piece of this struggle. More often than not I find myself telling a man that if he doesn't like how I look then he can hit the road. It is mostly women that I find myself seeking the attention/approval of when it comes to looks. It seems to be that women are more critical of other women than men ever were or tend to be these days. If we know how it feels to be judged on our appearance then why do we do it to each other?
It is a difficult thing to work on comparing yourself to others and judging others as well. Some times we catch ourselves casting judgement on people even without meaning to do so. "I can't believe she thinks that shirt looks okay on her." or "Did she even look in the mirror before she left the house this morning?" I will be the first to admit I have done it and still do it just in every day conversation without thinking twice about how I feel when that happens to me.
It moments like that when I realize I quite possibly need to spend more time grounding myself in the Lord. Yes, I realize this sounds silly and trivial and a moment where you are thinking.. yeah yeah... the answer is always Jesus...get closer to God but really people...it is the answer!
The more I pour myself into the word and the more I spend focusing on Christ the less I see myself acting like someone I would be ashamed of or doing things I don't approve of when its on the flip side. No there isn't a specific verse that says " and Jesus said... do not make fun of the girl in the ugly shirt or do not make jokes because another girl did something weird with her hair."
But the Bible does call us to be Christ like... and being Christ like covers a multitude of attitudes, issues, and priorities. The more you become more Christ like you will learn to love yourself in return.
Over the past few months I have been working on walking the straight and narrow, as they say. Spending my time focusing on my relationship with the Lord and although I am no where near where I need to be... I am not where I once was.
I find myself leaving the house more confident whether it is in those paint stained workout pants and a Goodwill t-shirt or that cute dress and red lipstick... I'm walking out of the house confident in the Lord's plans for me and that whatever happens today or how I look...I can make it a rough day and complain about my muffin top that I don't necessarily work on improving or I can make it a good day and only let words of encouragement about myself and others come across those velvet red lips.
For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
Ephesians 2:10
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