Tier 2 Adult

During a conversation with a fellow young adult, they told me I seemed to have it all together.

I'll be honest... I looked behind me and around the room to make sure they were talking to me and not someone behind me.

Me? Have it together? HA!

In our small group we have a joke about Tier 1-2-3 adults.
Tier 1- you are the age of an adult but still pretty dependent on your parents
Tier 2- you are independent (pay bills, full time job) but you don't have any dependents
Tier 3- full fledged adulthood...kids..house... the whole shebang

You see by those standards I'm a Tier 2 adult. I have a full time job. I pay my bills. I clean my house. I cook (by that I mean I put 90 second rice in the microwave all by myself). But have it together? I have never really thought of myself as having it together.

That got me thinking. As young adults we compare ourselves to other people in our age range by what they have accomplished, married or single, kids, own a home, etc. I constantly compare my 29 year old life to those I see who are married, have a college degree, have a baby on the way, or just bought their first home. I, myself, do not have a college degree, I'm not married, I don't want kids, I rent my apartment, and I'm still paying on debt that I accumulated by being stupid. How does this person think I have it together?

I realized I'm not the only one comparing myself and my accomplishments or non accomplishments to those my age.

I have come a long way in the past few years from where I was but I am not where I want to be. Some days I'm lucky to feel like an adult just by prepping the coffee the night before. Other days I feel like I've got it together when my bra and underwear match. Then there are those days where I have intellectual conversations, solve crazy issues at work, use my planner in the correct way, get to appointments, and have meetings where I feel like I"m useful.

The point is everyone has their days and today just may not be the day where you feel like a true Tier 2 adult.  Tomorrow you may get to all your appointments/meetings on time and you might do laundry the best you've ever done it in your life. I've had to realize that I don't/can't/won't have it together all of the time and every minute of the day.

There are seasons of life where your bra and underwear match every day and you got through every meeting successfully without falling asleep. This season of life for me is one where I feel like carrying around a Tier 2 adult trophy but I constantly remind myself that the next season of life I might be picking up that 90 second bag of rice off the floor and people are asking my why I didn't brush my hair today.

I've learned that when you are gliding through this season of life with ease it's so easy to look at someone who is struggling and judge them. Remember that you were once that person or you will be that person at some point and take a moment to encourage them. What may seem like a harmless comment/joke could really kick someone when they are feeling down. I've been there... the truth is when that person told me they thought I had it together I felt like I was barely holding on to anything. We never know what someone is facing throughout each day and though it may appear to you that they have it together (or it may not, building someone up is much more satisfying.

To all you Tier 2 adults out there... find little things that you accomplish each day and make something out of that small feat. 

Mind The Gap

Mind The Gap- An audible of visual warning phrase used to warn people to proceed with caution while entering a station platform. 

Mind the gap is also a good phrase to use when approaching the every day topics that swirl in our society. The spatial gap between Christians and Non-Christians. 

Everywhere you turn there are two phrases that continue to be a part of every day jargon. 

Open Minded and Close Minded. 

We are told to be Open Minded to new ideas, thoughts, feelings, actions, and lifestyles. We are told to accept everything and reject nothing. We are scoffed when we disagree with what the world says is acceptable. We are made to feel wrong when we choose to say no in a world of yes.

As a Christian in today's society it is increasingly harder to know where you should stand and what battles are worth fighting. Love the sinner, hate the sin. We all know that phrase but what does that look like? How are we suppose to navigate a series of, what feels like traps, in a way that honor Christ but reflect our faith? 

I wish I had the answer but I don't. Some days I feel like I got it right and the things I said to someone have clicked. Then there are other days when the choices I make because of my faith are so outwardly condemned I start to question my motives and actions. 

As a Christian I have chosen to live a life worthy of Christ and with that choice there are actions/lifestyles/ideas that I cannot knowingly accept and still confidently walk in Christ. For the first time in my life I feel the weight of free will on my chest. I struggle daily with the thought of how much easier it would be to just live my life and not worry about how the rest of the world is fairing. 

Judgement is another word that is so quickly used today as well. Bible verses are being thrown around by those who know nothing about those who wrote the Bible, why it was written, or the Bible as a whole. Christians are being attacked by the very tool that was meant to provide comfort, power, and refuge. The moment a Christian has an opinion that differs from the world we are judging and we are close minded. I don't know how to fix that and I don't have all the answers. All I have is what my heart struggles with daily and what God is doing to help me through this life. 

This may come as a shock to some of you but as a Christian we should expect to face adversity and we should come to understand that there is a reason the world hates us disagreeing with it. We were made for something more. 

“If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.” - C.S. Lewis

The most recent uproar lately has been revolving around the transgender lifestyle and course Bruce Jenner. Bruce Jenner has been called a hero for his outward expression of an inward struggle. Yes you read that right...inward struggle...because I feel that is what is happening. An inward struggle to find his place in the world and for people struggling, our world today offers what seem to be answers. People who struggle grasp for anything and for his struggle the label hero has been given. Call me crazy but hero isn't the word that comes to my mind. 

The only word I see that ring true to this situation and issue is "weakness"...being unable to turn from the things of this world and giving in to what the world presents as a answer to the inward struggle. 

Where is the fine line of accepting a lifestyle/idea and saying no to something that seeks to destroy all that God has planned for his people? When do we close our minds to what the world is offering and open our hearts to give what the world is missing? 

As I said before, I don't claim to have all the answers and my walk with Christ is a daily development and an opportunity to grow. My pastor touched on this point very briefly Sunday when he said that the time for us to fight certain battles is coming and that there will come a time when it will be harder and harder to live as a Christian in this world. The only thing I disagree with is that the time has already come...it is just going to get more difficult as the days pass. There will come a time when we must choose and the time is here. 

"Dark and difficult times lie ahead. Soon we must all face the choice between what is right and what is easy."- Harry Potter 

All we can do is live and teach as Christ would and let Him take care of the rest. All we can do is live according to His Word and grow our own knowledge of Him. We should act in a way that supports the gospel. 

"But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hop that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. For it is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil. For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive in the Spirit." 

1 Peter 3:15-18